Lessons Learned From 9-11

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We all remember that day; where we were when we saw the news of one of the most tragic attacks on American soil. We all felt the pain of the loss and the shock of it all. It changed us as a Nation and a people in many ways. 

My thoughts go back to that day as we remember it on this 18th Anniversary. The many beautiful souls lost, the heartbreak, the fear that gripped us. But…for the long term what are some of the lessons we can learn from such a tragedy? Never waste pain. It carries many lessons in and of itself that can prove to be valuable. 

The thing that most grips me is…how many people that lost someone on that day lost someone that they had a fight with the week before and never got to make that right? How many wives said ugly things to their husbands that morning and they never came home? How many strained relationships did people have over petty stuff that they didn’t make right and now they live with that regret?

I know this happens more than any of us care to admit. Family members have a dispute that they allow to sever a relationship, friends have a disagreement that they don’t resolve, spouses split up over differences over who knows what. People/relationships are more valuable to us than anything we could have. Even though they can be the most aggravating also!

My question to us all is…is not ever being hurt by someone or the need to be right worth the cost of a relationship? In a society that tells us to “move on”, you have rights”, “you don’t have to put up with that from them”, ya-da ya-da ya-da… This type of rhetoric begs the question…why? Because it’s all about you? #ouch

We forget that WE hurt people, WE are wrong sometimes, and WE make mistakes in those relationships too. As the old saying goes…”It takes two to….” you fill in the blank. I’m not saying things don’t ever need to end, but the things I see in peoples lives they are severing relationships over are ridiculous. 

How many people who lost someone on 9-11 would love the chance to go back for a do-over?Just the chance to say I’m sorry or can we just forgive each other and start over, or I love you? That is easy to look at now and say yes to but IN the struggle with people it seems a lot harder to do. I get it. People make me crazy sometimes too!

BUT as believers…as people who say yes I’m a Christian, God’s word gives us many instructions about developing and operating in love, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is a Fruit of the Spirit for every difficult situation and person in our lives. We are required to display these traits in our relationships. It’s easy to do when we all agree but it’s when we disagree that the struggle gets real. 

In reality, God uses those difficult and intolerable people we have in our lives as sandpaper on our unspiritual soul and our un-renewed mind. Sorry…hard truth right there…but it’s a fact. Disagreements or just plain aggravations we have with people always bring out the junk in US that God wants us to work on. If we sever all relationships that frustrate us we are limiting God’s deeper work in us. 

When we allow God to use difficult people in our lives to work His ways into our souls and change US, then the difficult people no longer aggravate us. Not because they are not still aggravating but because we have changed. We can see past what they do to why they may be doing it, or we have more compassion for them, more understanding and grace. 

God’s allllll about YOU becoming all he has created you to be in him. We must stop worrying about everyone else, concentrate on ourselves and let God do what only he can do in all of us. Let’s tell people today that we love them, we are sorry, and please forgive me. Humble pie tastes better than regret feels.

 

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The Need To Be Right