Depression...The Silent Pain

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There’s a word that brings fear to our hearts at its mention. The overwhelming feelings and the threat of its outcome can be frightening. So many are suffering from its effects, so many don’t live through its onslaught. We may have friends or loved ones who have been affected or maybe it’s us who struggle. It’s the “D” word…it’s Depression.

It is estimated that about 9% of American adults suffer from some form of depression, 3% of adults have MDD, Major Depressive Disorder and it is the major cause of disability in Americans between the ages of 15 and 44 according to the CDC. Yes…it’s a problem for so many…including my own son. His story can be seen “here.”

People who have never suffered with it simply do not and can not understand it. Depression feels like someone hit you over the head leaving you disoriented and dased. You then need to get through your daily life but ahead of you is miles of deep mud you must wade through in the dark. You are so exhausted and feel like you can not go another step when someone tells you to, “just get over it. ”It’s a crushing, hopeless feeling. You want to get free but you have zero energy or motivation to “do” anything about it. Then one day death begins to look like the only way out. 

There are many treatments that can help people today. Yes please try them all if you have to, and I did, but it is my belief that our ultimate healing and total deliverance can only be found in Jesus. Our son’s struggle was unknown to us for a long time. No one knew I was literally drowning in pain. People suffering from depression almost never tell people how much they hurt. It’s a silent pain most carry without getting the help they need. 

Fifteen years ago I found myself sucked into it’s grasp. At first I didn’t understand what was happening. I couldn’t seem to think clearly enough to sort out what I was wrestling with. It took years and a revelation from God to see it. One day it was like a lightening flash…hey Torey it’s depression. Duh. I began to realize it ran in my family: my grandmother, father, sisters, nieces, son and now me had all been its victim. 

Mine is a long sad story I won’t get fully into today (it will be in my upcoming book) but I learned so much through this journey. We were working for the church which meant I was Pastorless so to speak in that our Pastor was my husbands “boss” not our Pastor so no real help there. We kept moving to different states with little to no support systems. I felt basically alone to fight this battle. I didn’t have people I felt I could turn to. I kept a bottle of pain medication tucked away “just in case” I couldn’t go any further. 

Life throws a lot at us. So many families are torn apart today leaving kids with two sets of parents being shuffled back and forth with little stability. Moms need to work fulltime to help support the family leaving kids to fend for themselves. Job loss, the stress of moving out of state, losing a child or spouse, all can have an effect on people’s emotions. Abuse is rampant.

Whatever the reason we find ourselves deep in depression, there is always hope. God gave me the word hope during my journey. I bought a plaque with that word on it, a small sign I kept out where I could see it and then a granddaughter came whose name is Hope. She is my son’s daughter who you saw in the video. When Danny Gokey’s song “Hope in Front of Me” came out it became a beacon crying out to me that there was hope in front of me if only I could believe it. He was speaking to me loud and clear…don’t give up Torey, I’m offering you hope! Hope is the anchor to our faith. Without it our faith has nothing hold onto.

Looking back God was right there, when people where not, showing me solutions one at a time. I very gradually got better until one final revelation brought me to freedom. The understanding I had to fight…this video “here” I played hundreds of times. Each time my fight and my attitude got a little stronger! Was it easy…absolutely not! It was the darkest most difficult battle I have ever fought. I was fighting for my very life. 

I understand what it is to be depressed. I know the hopelessness. But I’m here today and I’m totally free to tell you that YOU can also be free! My son is free and preaching the Gospel! It takes hard work I won’t lie. I had to fight when I didn’t feel like fighting, take steps I didn’t want to take, forgive who I didn’t want to forgive and rise up when I wanted to die. 

DO NOT GIVE UP! There is help for you. Depression is a demonic assault that has come to steal from you, to kill and destroy you. If Christ lives in you He is greater than anything your enemy can throw at you! Begin to trust him today and ask him to come to you with the help you need. If you are suffering and need help, please contact me on my website and I would be honored to help you. 

Jesus…you died for our healing. You died for our freedom. Come now by your spirit into the hearts and minds of everyone reading this Blog. Let your healing power saturate their minds eradicating depression like the plague it is. Fill them with supernatural hope. Show them steps to take to find the deliverance you offer. Open their eyes to truth that is found only in you….

 

 

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